Paula Kirsch Coaching

Coaching is like riding a bike

More than one coach has used this analogy to describe what coaching is and is not.

In life you can walk or ride to your destination. 

A Coach can help you get there quicker and with less stress by helping you find the best path and they may suggest using a bike to travel that path. Riding is easier and faster than walking, right?  Especially so if you have a motivating and supportive guide to explore options with, someone who points out a potential new path and then let’s you decide on the way to go. Before you know it, you’re discovering new directions and pedaling toward an exciting destination with the wind in your hair and sun on your face. (Don’t forget the sunscreen) Coaching is future focused.

A Consultant is someone who tells you where to sit and where to put your feet and when to pedal when to brake. They give instruction and then leave you on your own. 

A Therapist explores why it is important for your self-esteem or psyche, for you to ride the bike and to be successful. They will look at historical obstacles to finding a path and means of efficient travel and will assist you to overcome any fears or trauma you may have. Therapy looks at your past, and does “repair” work to enable you to move forward.

A Mentor shares with you their experience or expertise of cycling and advises you to ride in the most effective way they’ve found to ride.

A coach asks “what” and “how” questions

They listen to your desire to try riding. The coach asks you if you need instructions on how to ride and asks where you might get them.  The coach asks you to decide the color or kind of bike you’re want to ride. The coach runs along side the bike “checking in” to see if you’re enjoying the experience and asks what might make it more fun. The coach might ask about your experience and what was valuable, and whether or not you want to pursue mastery of bike riding. If you do, the coach helps devise a plan where you can attain that mastery.  If you don’t, then the coach may help you devise a plan to sell the bike.

How this relates to relationships, intimacy and dating

You are ready to date, or to explore different relationship models or different ways as a couple to physically or emotionally connect with your partner. You are moving forward and a coach can help you discover the best path. They can be in your corner, motivating and supporting your efforts, giving encouragement and guidance to finding out what works for you!

Coaching is not licensed

Because therapy is licensed, I can only work with therapy clients in Michigan and Connecticut. But not everyone is looking for or needs therapy, and I can work with coaching clients anywhere in the world via the same secure ZOOM connection I use with my therapy clients. When it comes to relationship issues, much of what I do under the banner of Therapy is actually more coaching based. If I work with you as a coach and I feel a therapist would be helpful for you I will let you know that. More than likely what you need is a coach in these instances to help you figure out what you want! Also because coaching is not licensed or regulated it is good to know who you are dealing with. Anyone can say they are a coach. I have the education and experience that you can trust. If you live outside of Michigan or Connecticut and/or want a relationship coach check out my sister business here.